Spider-Man & Friends CD (Spider-Man 2003)

 Posted: 2007
 Staff: The Editor (E-Mail)

Background

I guess the only surprising thing about this album is how long it took to be produced. This is a Kindergarten album, just the kind of thing that an undemanding three-year-old might enjoy.

Story Details

Check out the opening lyrics of the first song:

Spidey and friends. Spidey and friends.
They'll be friends. Right to the end.
One for all. All for one.
When they get together they have lots of fun.

Accompany this with a bouncy, dinky little tune played on a synth with a trombone backing, and I think you'll very quickly see what we're talking about.

To be frank, it's insufferable. Happy kids, bouncy music and clear, joyous lyrics, clearly spoken so everybody can sing along. I'm listening to it as I write this review, and I'm having trouble just holding my thoughts together. I'm torn between the powerful desire to get up and dance, and the equally powerful desire to vomit my breakfast cereal all over the keyboard.

Spider-Man! Spider-Man!
Everybody's talking 'bout Spider-Man.
If you need some help, he's gonna lend a hand.
That's why everybody loves Spider-Man!

Oh, the pain!

Come on! Come on! Come and meet the Hulk!
I'm big and green but I'm never mean,
and I never like to sulk!
Come and meet the Hulk!

Well, somebody has totally missed the point of The Hulk. Don't make me sulky! You wouldn't like me when I'm sulky!

Tracks are:

  1. Spidey and Friends
  2. Spider-Man
  3. Come and Meet the Hulk
  4. Captain America
  5. Spider-Girl
  6. Storm Can Change the Weather
  7. If You Like Wolverine Clap Your Hands
  8. It's Spider-Man
  9. If You('ve) Got Power
  10. S-P-I-D-E-R-M-A-N
  11. The Spider Dance
  12. Nobody Likes a Bully
  13. Where is Spider-Man
  14. Creeping, Creeping
  15. Spidey and Friends Gonna Like You
  16. Hangin' With Spidey

General Comments

I'm not saying that this album doesn't have its place. It would be perfect for getting rid of unwanted guests when parties have gone on too long. Or you could play it late at night at your local mall, to stop teenagers from hanging around in the parking lot.

Or even better, play it to death row inmates. They'll go willingly!

Overall Rating

This is terrible. Buy it for a toddler near you. Just, make sure you're out of the room before they turn it on!

 Posted: 2007
 Staff: The Editor (E-Mail)